“Uncertainty is the only certainty there is, and knowing how to live with insecurity is the only security.”~John Allen Paulos
Dealing with uncentertainty can be tough.
Not knowing what lies ahead or whether you’re on the right path can be nerve-racking. Not having figured out your path or purpose in life can sometimes cause levels of anxiety and stress.
The world is full of different opportunities for the taking and sometimes, you want to be sure an opportunity is for you before you take it; you want to be certain of an outcome to ensure that it is not a waste of time or a failed venture. You want to take a risk, but not too-big-a risk; you want to make your loved ones proud, be successful, fall in love, settle down with a family and be happy.
If you could, you would probably want to see the end from the beginning…just to be sure before taking that step; because some assurance that you’re on the right track and that things will turn out well always comes in handy.
However, life does not always go this way. Uncertainty is the only certainty there is. In other words, you will continue to exist in a space that is filled with uncertainties; not knowing the end from the beginning. You will continue to have “what–if?” questions, doubts and wonder whether it will all be worth it at almost every phase in life.
You may be undergoing a phase of uncertainty in your life or have just completed one phase, uncertain of what the next holds. You may be afraid of the change that comes with the next phase or in fact, have no idea of what it’s supposed to look like.
I am learning a lot about making peace with uncertainties in life and not being able to predict the future. So here are 7 ways you can handle uncertainty.
1. Let go and Make Peace
The first step to dealing with uncertainty is learning to let go and make peace with the fact that you cannot control everything and everyone. While you may strive to have total control over your life and take responsibility for your every action, you do not have total control of life in general.
To deal with uncertain phases in your life, you need to be willing to understand that some things are just way beyond your control and this should be okay. You may be able to control what you say but you cannot control how someone will interprete it; you cannot control another human being’s feelings towards you no matter how hard you try; you can submit your CV for a job application, but you cannot control the HR Manager’s actions; you cannot control your children, your friends or the universe as a whole.
So what do you do? You simply make peace with this fact and take each day as it comes, hoping for the best and working hard to get the best.
2. Trust Yourself
Right now, you may be trying to find your purpose or what on earth you are here for. You may just be waiting for the next best opportunity to kick off the next phase of your life.
Whatever the case may be, you need to learn to trust yourself. Trust your capabilities and believe in you. You are doing your very best to make some good out of life and you will be rewarded for all your hard work. You may be quite unsure of what the future holds and overtime, may have started doubting your capabilities to achieve a task at hand or get that job or get admission into school or start that business or that blog or YouTube channel.
Resist negative thoughts such as “Will I be good enough?”, “Will they like me?”, “What if I’m not accepted?”, “What if they laugh?”, “What if it fails?” and engage! The best way for you to know if an opportunity is for you is to engage with it; try it out.
Most of the time, you do not lose anything by trying, but all the time, you lose 100 percent of the shots you do not take.
Trust yourself. Trust the God in You.
You can do it
Sometimes it can get overwhelming not knowing what the future holds and not having figured things out in your current phase of life. The pressure on you right now may be seemingly insurmountable because a lot of expectations are weighing you down. In your world, you have no choice but to “make it.”
In the midst of all the uncertainty, the drama, the “hustling” and “bustling”, the disappointments and emotional rollercoasters as well as the hopes and expectations, remember to Breathe.
Once in a while, take some time out for yourself. Breathe in and out intentionally. Exhale the stress and inhale the positivity and bright hopes for the future. Take some time out to do things you love, hang out with friends, watch a movie, take in the beauty of life, take periodic mental breaks and stay emotionally and physically present.
It’s pretty easy to get lost in the overwhelmingness of life, planning for a future that you cannot see and striving to put the right things in place. Enjoy each moment life gives you and remember to stay positive.
4. Maintain a Positive Attitude
I will be the first to admit that sometimes, this could be very tough to do in the midst of uncertainty.
However, the good news is that you have a choice. You always have a choice. You can either choose to have and maintain a positive attitude towards life in general and be positive about what the future holds for you or you can choose to be consumed by negative thoughts.
Remember that you attract what you are ready for and what you speak over your life. I believe that words are very powerful, no matter what context they are used. If you constantly speak about how hopeless your reality is and how it does not seem to get better or will it ever get better, then that is what will manifest in your life. However, if you speak positivity into different areas of your life even when you have no clue what the future holds, even when it seems bleak, you will manifest that positivity over your life and reap fruitful rewards.
5. Stay Focused on Your Journey
While it is important to learn to speak positivity over your life, it is equally important to stay focused on your journey.
YOU HAVE TO RESIST THE URGE TO ENGAGE IN UNHEALTHY COMPARISONS.
Put your head down and focus on what needs to be done. Remember that you can only control so much, so do what you can. If you need to tidy up your CV, apply to that school, take a first step towards a business, take a leap of faith or work on a relationship, DO IT. Do what you can control and leave the rest to God.
Believe it or not, everyone is trying to figure life just like you. No one has it all figured out, including the ones who do. We all have uncertain moments and moments of success culminating in individual journeys in life. So do not compare your behind-the-scenes with another person’s highlight reel. If you need to take some time off from social media, do it. If you need to unplug, do it. But remember that it is YOUR journey; it does not have to look like that of another person.
6. Avoid labelling
Avoid negative labelling when you are going through any form of uncertainty. If you have not gotten desired results in your life after trying a number of times, do not label yourself as “stupid”, “dumb”, “broken”, “not smart enough”, “not good enough”. You also need to refrain from making statements like “I always mess things up” or “I’ll mess this up”.
Your mind feeds into what you continuously tell yourself. Negative labelling does not keep you focused and strips you of the strength to go on.
7. Keep Going!
Most importantly, keep going!
Even in the midst of uncertainty, do not give up, do not give in, do not stop.. Keep going. Keep putting in those applications, keep studying hard for that exam, keep acquiring those skills, keep hoping for the best and feeding your mind with positive thoughts.
You may not have it all together or figured out right now, but that is okay. One day you will, and one day it would all be worth it. So do what you can and stay focused and consistent!
Trust the process. Trust God. Trust your journey and never give up.
Remember, you miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.
Love and Light,
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